Have Sponge, Will Travel

I'm thinking about cleaning a few houses here and there. I am a self-confessed compulsive cleaner myself, I have too much time on my hands, and little money of my own, so wouldn't it make sense to put that cleaning compulsion to work for some spending money. If it worked, I would probably do it for the next two years or so, until Andrew goes to preschool and I need to get a "real" job. In the meantime, I think I could do three or four houses. It would give me a small income to play with and be something to get me out of the house. I know women around here charge at least $50 per house, depending on size. My thoughts are $50 for 2000 square feet and under, $75 for over 2000 square feet. I'd like to start with people I know, or with friends of people I know. At this point I would take Andrew with me. He's here when I'm cleaning, so what's the difference if I have him strapped to me or in a portable playpen here or at someone else's house? It's something I've been tossing around for a while, so I'm putting it out for everyone's input.

Part of me feels like I am wasting my education cleaning someone else's toilet, and that cleaning, when it's not your own home, is somewhat demeaning. The other part of me feels like, hey, $50 a house isn't bad pay, I'm not working anywhere else, and if I were working I'd have someone here to help me and not think any demeaning thoughts of her (or him, I guess).

So what do you all think? First of all, does anyone want, or know of anyone who wants, a cleaning lady who wouldn't mind me bringing the baby along? (Obviously that question is posed to local friends - I'm not driving to Pittsburgh to clean!) Secondly, do you think I'm setting myself up for feeling belittled or is it really no big deal? Let me know - here or email me.

Andrew Laughing

Ramblings on the Frailty of Life

Recently I have been thinking much about the frailty of life. It’s not necessarily the just aged people in my life I have been thinking about., but rather everyone who is meaningful to me. I find myself feeling increasingly grateful for those I have been fortunate enough to know and finding the unique blessings that each person brings into my life more and more readily apparent. These are not necessarily revelations; I’ve been aware of these small miracles for a long time. For me, the ease by which I forget or take for granted my prosperity waxes and wanes depending on the stage and state of my life. During those times when stress is high and time is short, gratitude can unfortunately fly out the door. This is probably common among many people, but instead of excusing such behavior, we should see the sadness in it, because it is really during the times of stress and anxiety that it would behoove us most to regroup and be grateful rather than dwelling on the negative.

These days I find my emotions in a constant state of flux. There are times when I feel overwhelmed with motherhood and the changes that have pummeled me over the last few months. Likewise, there are times when I feel relaxed and at ease with where I am. I can feel irritated and over-stimulated by my children and then overcome with a sense of awe in their mere presence. Regardless of which side of the pendulum I am on, the trick for me now is to keep my focus on my life‘s priorities - my children, my husband, my extended family and friends and my faith, especially during moments of frustration.

I just finished the book, “The Last Lecture,” by Randy Pausch, the professor at Carnegie Mellon who just died of pancreatic cancer at 47. It’s a good book and I recommend it to everyone. It’s easy and fast to read, and the message is simple and uplifting. I found myself throughout the book wondering how I would react if I knew that I had only months to live. He very gracefully took his diagnosis as an opportunity to be right with the world, to let those around him know how much they really meant to him, to spend quality time with his children and to say his heartfelt goodbyes. He tells us, however, that we should not limit this kind of living to when we are dying. At the end he says, “If you lead your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself.” We need to lead our whole lives the right way, not just the ends.

I’m not sure that I would want to know when I was going to die. I think it would be very easy to get caught up in the more depressing aspects of the prognosis. But in some aspects, I also think that he and his family were very lucky. Not many people are given the chance to say goodbye and have a peaceful closure to losing a loved one. When a person dies unexpectedly, it leaves those around him (or her) feeling not only the loss of the person, but also the loss of the chance to say goodbye. Obviously I don’t envy Randy Pausch, or mean to imply that he is lucky to have had a terminal illness and die so young. His children will grow up without a father, and his wife has lost her spouse and her best friend. Although his message to us is uplifting, his circumstances are ultimately very tragic and sad. What makes it remarkable is that Randy was able to look at his situation and see the gift in it. How would we treat others if we knew that we were going to die in 3 months? I imagine that for most of us, we would act very differently than we currently do. We’d love each other more, spend more time together, call up long lost friends, make sure that everyone knew - in very specific words - just what they meant to us. We would invest our time making memories that our loved ones could hold onto in our absence. That is how I would spend my time in the face of a terminal illness.

Think hard on that for a moment, though. What’s wrong with that aforementioned picture?
What’s wrong is that we should do those things anyway. There is no guarantee that any of us have tomorrow. There’s no guarantee that any of us have 5 hours from now, so why do allow ourselves to get so caught up in the daily grind and limit our emotional lives? At the end of our lives, what do we really want to be remembered for? What legacy to we want to leave our children? It’s an old lesson, I admit; nothing that any of us hasn’t heard before, but nonetheless it is so true. God gives us many opportunities every day to chose how we are going to react, effect and change our circumstances. Instead of getting angry, upset, depressed, frustrated, etc. if we chose to change our reactions to ones emitting peace and compassion, how would it change our world for the better? And shouldn’t we think about this all the time, not just when something tragic happens to trigger our emotions.

My thoughts, in agreement with Randy Pausch, are this: If we lead our lives the right way, we sleep better. We eat better, we love better, we live better. We feel better about ourselves and we can go to bed at night knowing that our families and friends know exactly how much we love them. That’s the way I want to go to sleep - knowing that I acted in accordance to my own morals. That I acted with integrity. That I treated others not only with respect, but also with compassion and empathy, and that there is no question in anyone’s mind just how much I really do care.

It takes practice and patience and perseverance, and it takes getting over the fears of rejection or humiliation or whatever else holds us back from adequately communicating. I’m practicing daily and I’m making progress, with God’s help. In the meantime, for those of you who don't already know, I love each and every one of you for the unique and wonderfully varied perspectives you have brought into my life. I believe that we enter each others paths for a reason, and that we can and should learn from every person we encounter. Even the smallest lesson is an advantage. I hope that I am open and learning - and that I am in some small way teaching as well!

The Sweet Sound of Laughter

Today has been another typical day for me. Jacob left last night to go to a water park in Erie with my mom, sister and aunt. Greg left at 430 this morning to go pre-fishing for a tournament he is in tomorrow, so I woke up alone with Andrew. Lindsay came at 930 so I could run, I had a decent run - 4.25 miles - not bad, but not great either. Lindsay stays until I shower, which is usually around 11 or so, then she heads home. After I fed Andrew lunch we went for a 1.5 hour walk around town and to the grocery store for a few small items. When we came home, he needed to eat again and then we were just hanging out as usual. I laid him on a blanket on the carpet and played some games with him, as much as you can play with a 3 month old. Then out of my own boredom, not his, I decided to pull his basket of toys over and try out each and every one of them! I showed him the yellow duck - got a smile. Showed him the pink elephant, thought "aren't pink elephants indicative of drunkenness" - got a smile from him and myself. Showed him the blue bear rattle and got a smile too. Nothing big. Got out the multicolored fish rattle, a hand me down from my niece, and shook it in front of him. He laughed! I mean a real full-bellied laugh! What!?! I shook it again and he laughed again. It was the first true laugh for him and it was amazing! My cell phone was close, so I quickly filmed him laughing so I could share it with others, especially Greg. He wasn't laughing as much once I got out the phone, because he was noticing the phone as well, but you can still hear it. (I'll post it later) It almost brought tears to my eyes, it was so cool. Amazing how much those little things can make your day.

I also sent Greg a text and said that perhaps the fact that it took a fish toy to get the first laugh out of Andrew is a good sign for his tournament tomorrow! We shall see!

Repetitious Indoor Gymnastics and My Proceeding Reactions

Here's the scene:
My living room, one day last week. Keep in mind, however, that this is a common conversation, with just a bit of the dialogue changing.

Jacob, jumping wildly on the couch, completely unaware that he is doing something I have asked him countless times not to do: "Mom! Mom! Look at me! Watch what I can do!"

Me, in an exasperated tone: "Jake, when are you going to realize that I don't want you jumping on the furniture?"

Jacob, bewildered: "I thought you changed your mind. It's been a few days since I jumped on the couch."

Me, feeling defeated: "No. I haven't changed my mind. Please don't jump on the furniture."

Jake: "OK"

This scene will repeat every few days.
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Yesterday, again in my living room. Jacob is jumping inside Andrew's Bumbo seat, again not for the first time.

Me: "Jacob, get out of that seat. It's for a baby. You are going to break it."

Jacob: "I'm not sitting in it, I'm standing."

Me: "I don't want you inside or on that seat in any way." (He is SO good with semantics. Once I told him that I didn't want him watching Spiderman 3 because it was too violent. I then found him at my aunt's house watching Spiderman 1. When I asked what he was doing, he said, "You said not to watch Spiderman 3. This is the first Spiderman.")

Back to the present. Me again: "I'm not going to tell you again. The next time I see you in that seat, you are going to pay me a quarter." Money is usually a good motivator for him.

Jacob, smugly: "Oh, a quarter. That's not very much money."

Me, agitated : "Fine then, if I catch you in that seat again, you will pay me one dollar."

Jacob, shocked: "But I only have one dollar in my wallet."

Me, matter-of-factly: "Then don't get inside that seat again."
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These are our daily arguments. Don't jump on the furniture. Don't get in the baby's seat, swing, stroller, etc. Don't eat yogurt in the living room. Put your toys away when you are done. Please get out of the car in under 15 minutes and remember to shut the car door when you finally get out, because the rest of us have already gone into the house. The list goes on, but you get the point.

I have times when I lose my temper unnecessarily over these things, because I'm just so exasperated at the frequency of my failed attempts at curtailing such behavior. Recently, however, I've been trying to look more at the big picture and less at the everyday little stresses that can get so out of hand. My friends with teenagers and college age kids have told me to enjoy these days. These are the times when I know where my children are at all times. I have full control over who they associate with and what influences their lives. They are safe, and the behavioral issues that we encounter, although trying at times, are minute in the grand scheme of life.

Admittedly, I am human and I don't always pick the right battles to fight. I question which battles are indeed small, and which will escalate into bigger problems if not addressed in their infancy. Again, it all comes back to the simple concept of balance. If we, as parents, can find that balance between over and under reacting, and teach our kids to reign their behaviors and reactions appropriately, it should all work out favorably in the long run...right???

Maybe part of the problem is that parents now over-think everything. Perhaps if we just followed our guts and didn't worry so much about every interaction, things would work out just fine anyway. I'm sure if my grandmother were still alive, she would think that some of the tactics I use are ridiculous. I can imagine her telling me "Don't reason with the kid, just tell him how it is going to be and move on." Her kids turned out OK without time-outs and positive reinforcement, redirection and all the rest of the child rearing lingo. Could it be possible that mine would too?

I think that most of the changes in discipline are for the better. We now see our children not as simple insubordinates, but for the budding persons that they are - complete with emotions and motivations as true as our own. I also believe that most people are good at heart and have good intentions. No one can convey those intentions in an articulate and unflawed manor all the time, but most of us do a pretty good job at it most of the time. When we know that our spouses, our kids, and our friends have intentions and true personalities that are pure and sincere, we don't need to be so analytical about our interactions or so rigid with rules.

I don't want my children to grow up to complicate things like I do. I want them to be able to live in the moment, but plan for the future, with confidence and security, without constantly worrying whether or not they are doing the right thing. I want them to see the big picture but not sweat the small stuff. I'm hoping that time and practice will allow me to do the same, and that by setting a good example, they will effortlessly (Ha! Somewhat anyway! I'm not completely delusional) learn those skills as well. Most importantly, I'm hoping that in the meantime, I will be able be aware of my blessings more often and of the ease and goodness of this stage in our life as a family, and look forward to being able to do the same in the future, regardless of what that stage may be.

Right now, however, I need to invest in some good quality couch covers! :)


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On a not so serious note - last night, Jake was watching TV and a commercial for some contest came on. He said, "I hope I win a Subway card." There is really nothing at Subway that he would eat, so I said, "What would you do with a Subway card?" "Well, I'd buy a ham sandwich." Then he paused, "and I'd buy a sandwich for you and Greg too." Ask a simple question, get a simple answer!

The Woes of Oral Surgery

During my pregnancy, I developed an overgrowth of taste buds on the tip of my tongue. Gross, I know. After Andrew was born, I called my dentist to find out what kind of doctor removed such anomalies. He told me to contact an oral surgeon, which I immediately did. The oral surgeon wanted a referral from my family doctor as well as from an Ear Nose and Throat doctor. What? Seriously? To snip off something smaller than a pin head? Yes, that was what was needed. OK. So I called the ENT, who then stated that he did not do surgery on tongues, unless it was far back on the tongue and mine is on the tip. UGH! What the heck! If I had the guts, I would have just snipped the darn thing off myself, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. SO...I called another oral surgeon, who then said she would look at it for me. Whew! Thank God. This thing is irritating.

Today I had the appointment. The doctor informed me that it is not an enlarged taste bud, but rather an inflamed salivary gland that started to grow. OK. That's even more gross! She had a cancellation and wanted to know if she could take it off right then. Yes, please! So she put a little numbing gel on my tongue and then proceeded to give me a shot which lasted at least 45 seconds and made my toes curl. Wow. I've never had an oral anesthetic. I never had a cavity until I was 29 and even then, it was so small that I didn't need Novocaine to have it filled. She let the anesthetic kick in, which also contained a vasoconstrictor to minimize bleeding. Within about 10 minutes, my tongue felt like it was as big as a golf ball and filled with jello, and the entire tip was blanched ghostly white from the lack of blood flow. Then the very friendly assisting nurse kept talking to me, which made me feel like an idiot, because I had just developed the worst lisp/speech impediment known to man!

Shortly thereafter the surgeon returned, clipped off the growth and soldered the wound with a laser, which filled the room with the stench of burning flesh, and proceeded to coat my entire mouth and throat with the TASTE of burnt flesh. Jeffrey Dahmer, dude, I don't see the appeal. However, at long last, my tongue has a flat surface, even though it currently also has a centimeter long hole with singed edges. At least now no one can complain that I look like I have food stuck to my tongue anymore! I sure do hope that the lisp doesn't last too much longer, though!

The Boys Are Back...

With Jacob's return from the beach, the neighbor boys have also reappeared. The older one actually showed up at 6pm on Sunday, in the rain, wanting to play inside. Yesterday they all played outside for a little while and then they were here again today at 4. I filled up water balloons for the boys this afternoon, and they had fun doing that for a while. Then, of course, they wanted to play inside. The deal is that they can play in the game room only. Shortly after coming inside, the older boy walked up the stairs and through the living room, on his way to the kitchen. When I asked him what he was doing, he said, "Oh, I was just going to get myself a snack." What? I would never have gone into someone else's home and helped myself to their cupboards unless they were a close relative! I still wouldn't, unless I was specifically instructed to. I told him that I would get him a snack, but that I would appreciate if he ask before getting into our cabinets or refrigerator in the future. THEN, my mom called to take Jake for a walk. I told the boys that they could stay until she arrived, and then they would need to go home (they had been here for 3 hours already). Instead, the older boy (again) stated the he would be going along with Jacob and my mom. At that point, I had to send them home. Really, the younger boy is two years older than Jake. They get along well and he's a sweet little guy. The older boy is 4 years older than Jake and I think that the reason he wants to be in my house and to get into Jake's stuff is more because he is bored playing with the younger boys than because he actually wants to play with Jacob. Nonetheless, Jacob continues to enjoy playing with them, so I just sit back and let things slide. Most days it doesn't bother me, but there are times when I have to breathe deeply and remind myself that they are just kids. Today when they rang the bell, Jake yelled, "Woo Hoo! I'm going outside to make their dreams come true!" He certainly isn't tiring of their company.

This and That

This evening I told Jake that my stomach was a little upset and he said, "You must be homesick...or maybe seasick."

I went grocery shopping today. Not a big deal. I went to the deli and there were two women behind the counter, and one woman ahead of me ordering something. I didn't take a number, because there was no line. Why waste the paper? While the woman in front of me finished her order a man came up and took a number. Just then, the woman working the counter asked me for my order. I told her what I wanted and as she went to slice the ham, the man looked at me and said, "You dropped your number." I said, "I didn't take a number." He very rudely said, "I know. That's why I said that." I looked at the baby and said in a baby tone, "This man is a jerk." Seriously. He was waited on before I even left the counter. Was that necessary?

The Spelunking Clan

Today we visited Lincoln Caverns. Jacob had a blast. I had no idea that he would be so excited about caves! He thought it was very cool to be so far under ground. We even saw a bat taking a mid-day snooze. The kids were also able to pan for jewels, which Jacob enjoyed. He came away with a bag full of pretty stones. Afterwards we went out to lunch where Jacob invented the "chicken finger drinker." He put a fork with chicken skewed on it upside down through the straw hole of his cup. He would take a drink of his soda and then turn the cup around to take a bite of chicken. How inventive of him! :) Greg's parents watched Andrew and said they had a fun day playing with the baby.

Now that Jake is home, the boys down the street have already returned. One of them rang our doorbell at 6 pm wanting to play inside here. I sent him home - we've had enough excitement for today, but tomorrow is another day!

Jacob returned home yesterday from the beach. He was given a dose of Dramamine, so the drive back wasn't so traumatic. When he was recounting his drive to the beach to my aunt Carmen, he said that he only filled the garbage bag half way with vomit, because most of it was on the seat. Yuck. That's just not good for anyone!

He had a wonderful time on vacation. He said, "I can stay up until 10:oo and get up whenever I want. That's why they call it the beach." I'm not sure exactly how calling it "the beach" and tweaking your bedtime are related, but in the mind of a 5 year old, they are.

He picked out a seashell bracelet for me, and when I thanked him, he informed me that they were not seashells. He said they were "crab hands, and when you turn them over, you can see what's inside crab hands." They did look like the claw of a crab, I'll give him that, but I am really grateful that they were not in fact crab hands!

Yesterday Greg did not work at all. It was very nice for all of us to spend time together. Greg, Andrew and I went shopping and out to lunch before Jake came home. Then we all spent the day just hanging out together, like a normal family weekend. Everyone must have been exhausted, though, because no one got up until 8:20, and even then it was only Jacob! How nice for me to get up, have my coffee and breakfast and read the paper before meeting the demands of the kids.

Jake dressed himself this morning - a long sleeve shirt, dress shorts and fleece socks. He looked at me and told me to "take a break" and he would get his own breakfast. Then he said, "Mom, do you like having three boys in your house?" I said, "Yes, I do." He said, "That's good. I like being one of them."

Later my mother in law will watch the baby while Greg, Jacob and I meet Greg's friend and his family for an outing to Lincoln Caverns. Although I grew up in this area, I've never been there. I think I'm as excited as Jake!

I don't know if I'm as excited about the actual caves as I am about us having the chance to spend an entire weekend together. Greg works way too many hours and way too many days, so we truly cherish the times that we are able to spend together uninterrupted. We are grateful for one day, let alone two consecutive days!

OK, I'm signing off, because Jacob really is getting his own breakfast and the fridge just opened...dry cereal is one thing, but when he gets out the milk, I have to intervene.

Sorry for the choppiness of this entry.

To Work Or Not To Work

Disclaimer:
No emotions in this blog express judgment on any woman aside from myself. Please, please, please - to any stay at home moms reading this - DO NOT think that I am underestimating your value to your families. Indeed, I think motherhood is the most important job in the world. I believe that mothers in many respects are more important than fathers (also not intended to devalue fathers). We as mothers are in the trenches, cleaning the vomit, wiping butts, molding and shaping the future of our country. The forthcoming ramblings are simply indicative of my own insecurities and struggle with coming to terms with my newfound position.

OK. Here goes.
Although I have been putting forth great effort into focusing on the blessing of being able to stay at home with Andrew and watch him grow, I find the desire to work continually creeping up on me. It’s not a financial worry, but I must admit that the prospect of relying solely on Greg not only for our household expenses, but also for my own expenditures is a bit disconcerting. Buying him a Christmas, birthday or anniversary gift from his own money seems counterintuitive. In a way, it feels as if I am returning to the 8th grade, when I had to save my weekly allowance to buy my own trivialities, and asked my dad for money to buy my mom a birthday present. Likewise, although I would never dispute the contributions that stay at home moms make to their families, the fact that I am not contributing financially to our household makes me feel more like a burden than an asset. I don’t bring much debt into the marriage, but I live in this home and even if I didn’t make enough money to pay a majority of the household bills, at least I knew that I did not create more burden by asking for money for my student loans or my personal needs. And when I was working, I never felt guilty about going out to lunch, buying a CD or a book if I felt like it, etc. Also note - Greg never makes me feel this way. These too are the workings of my mind alone. All of that aside, we have gone over finances and there is no need for me to worry about these things. We are fully capable of living the life that we are accustomed to without my income, therefore money need not be a driving factor in my decision to return to work.

What is it then? Why am I not able to simply sit back and enjoy myself? Well, it’s partly because I am not able to just sit back and enjoy anything. For some God forsaken reason, I have a need to overanalyze, overemphasize and complicate all that enters into my life. I can’t even clean my house without making an exaggerated micromanaged list to hang on my refrigerator. I truly hope that I do not pass this trait on to my children.

With the loss of my job, I have somewhere along the line experienced a loss of self. It’s not that my job defined me. I hardly had a glamorous career, but I had a professional life. I was needed by someone outside of my home, and I was seen as at least a consultant of sorts, if not an authority of my field. I also was able to get out of the house everyday and interact with people outside of my family, without the demands of my children. There were many times when I felt burdened by the responsibility of working on top of caring for Jacob and the house. It was difficult to cram all of my cleaning and socializing into Saturday and Sunday, and I was frequently exhausted at the end of the day, both emotionally and physically. But, in the middle of the day while I was driving, the thought of being with Jacob again was emotionally uplifting. I looked forward to picking him up from day care or school and seeing his smiling face when I arrived. When I saw him again, I felt refreshed as a mother. Although I may have felt drained and stressed by my day, I had had a break from motherhood and was ready to return to it refreshed, at least as a mother if not a whole person.

I believe there are women who stay at home with their children and are very good at it. They love it, and their children thrive because of the love and attention that they are given - love and attention that is best received from one’s mother, and that cannot be matched by any other caretaker. Such women are natural moms. I give them much credit. Raising happy, healthy children is no small feat. I also think there are women who stay at home even when they have a strong desire to work outside, because they feel that is their duty. Some of these women also do a wonderful job raising their children. I give these women credit for putting their own needs aside for the sake of their kids. Then there are women who stay at home and clearly should not…we’ll leave that one well enough alone. We all know women who fit that category.

I don’t think that I am someone who is going to cause detriment to my children by staying at home, but I also do not think that I am a natural stay at home mom either. I could be that woman who puts her own needs aside and takes care of the kids, but I wonder what it is that makes me feel like I have to be her. What good am I doing by staying at home? And really, what example am I setting for my kids that it’s OK to be unhappy yourself as long as others are cared for? Is that how I want my boys to live their lives? No, I don’t want them to grow up to be self-serving adults caring for no one’s needs but their own. But isn’t it our responsibility as parents to teach our children how to balance life? Balance - the answer to all our questions - our growing waistlines; balance diet and exercise - alcohol; consume moderately - our expanding workloads and family demands; balance the two, work hard but play harder - our own needs versus other’s; find a balance. It’s such a simple concept which could bring so much relief, but is so difficult to do.

I don’t accept change well. I never have. I like my routines, my plans, my lists, and when a wrench is thrown into those things, I panic. I am trying to give myself time to adjust, to calm down and assess my situation after the panic mode has subsided to avoid making rash decisions. It seems to me, however, that most of my day’s time is now spent thinking about working, the need to work, the need to find that professional validation that motherhood alone cannot fill, the break, the daily interactions with people outside of my family. Yes, I’m still somewhat in panic mode. But I believe that these thoughts are not going to subside with time. To be true to myself, I need to work.

During my morning run today, I decided that I will begin a full job search come January. That will have given me plenty of time to adjust and ensure that I am not making a rash decision. It will alleviate any stress arising from working around the holidays, and it will have given me 8 months with Andrew. Perhaps I will change my mind by then, but I highly doubt it. It will also give me a tangible end to my struggles with staying at home. I’m hoping that it will allow me to focus on those things which unfortunately have become clouded for me - the blessing of watching this baby grow, the opportunity to be there 100% for my family, the love of a husband who goes above and beyond to support his family. I really am grateful for these things. I sincerely thank God each and every day for my two wonderful sons, the best husband I could ask for, healthy living parents and a large extended network of family and friends, my own health and well being. I’m aware of my place on this earth and the privileges that have been bestowed upon me, and I believe that I will be a better person - to myself and to others - when I can be true to my own needs, whatever they may be, without guilt. I’m praying that day is coming.

Jake Sparrow

Jacob called today before embarking on a pirate excursion. He told me he was going to search for treasure and possibly bring me home a large jeweled ring, or four quarters. (Picture to be added soon)

Yesterday when he called he wanted to know if I wanted anything from the Candy Kitchen. He informed me that there is a large Candy Kitchen, a small Candy Kitchen and a medium Candy Kitchen. 3 Candy Kitchens! His favorite place to shop! Unfortunately, I can't reprimand him too much, because his sweet tooth is something else that he inherited from me. As a mom, though, the thought of what he has been eating this week makes me cringe.

Mom said he made a little girlfriend at the condo's pool. Apparently they played together for about an hour before the girl decided to dump a hatful of water on Jake. Jake didn't retaliate, though - he told the girl that "maybe it would be better if we took a break from each other for a while." Aw. His first break-up. At least he let her down gently!

Bushels of Berries

Yesterday we went blackberry picking at Canoe Creek with Greg's parents and SaraBeth. Initially, we thought that we missed the prime berry window, but as it turned out, we had plenty of berries by the end of the evening (as well as plenty of scrapes up and down our legs!). I actually made a pie - from scratch - from the berries we picked! Those of you who know me, know that this is an amazing fete for me. I don't cook well, let alone bake! The pie looks and smells yummy, but we haven't actually eaten it yet, so perhaps I should hold off on bragging! :) I can say that I did remember the sugar this time...the last time I made a pie was over 5 years ago at NTAC (the day center where I worked with adults with MR). I thought that a can of pumpkin pie filling was all that was needed in a pumpkin pie. So, I took some of the guys and baked a pie for their Thanksgiving feast. The next day, I wasn't there (I don't remember why), but I was told that the pie was less than appealing. One client, who was particularly enamoured with pie, ate it anyway! Poor guy. The rest just decided to forgo dessert that day. What a let down! Hey, at least I didn't catch it on fire, like the time I tried to grill, but that's a story for another day - that and the time I ran the Access sized van into the bank...literally...or the time I lost a client at Sams Club...actually, I had a number of follies on that job. It's a wonder they kept me. Must be my inherent charm! :)

OK, back to the berry picking - I sent a picture of Andrew and me to Jacob via my mom's cell phone. He called me shortly thereafter and asked what his 'brudder' said. When I told him the baby missed having him there to pick berries, he said that he missed having his brother at the beach. He then went on to tell me how healthfully he has been eating, which my mother later recounted as a steady diet of sugar - namely wax pop bottles with sugar syrup (remember those from when we were little?), fried food and more sugar. Jacob has a skewed version of health. Oh well, he's on vacation.

When I jokingly asked Jacob if he was going to bring me a gift home, he said he had already purchased a shell bracelet. Aw, guess he's thinking about me after all...at least a little!

Carsick, Yes. Homesick, No.

Jacob is at the beach this week with my mom, my uncle and his family and my aunt and her family. Usually my sister, two other aunts and Greg and I also go along, but this year, for various reasons, the beach plans have been altered. Next year we will resume the normal routine.

Anyway, Jacob called me on Saturday afternoon when they arrived, and told me that he had vomitted most of the way. Poor guy. Mom stopped at two stores, but couldn't find any Dramamine. Luckily she was able to get some at the beach for the drive home. That's something he inherits from me. I guess we'll be drugging him for long trips from now on.

On a more positive note, he is having a wonderful time. Mom has sent me several pictures on the cell phone of him at the beach (posted). He called last night and told me that he is learning to jump waves. Then he said, "this is going to be a short talk tonight, mom. I have chocolate that I'm not allowed to eat until I'm done talking to you." Hmmm...I guess chocolate has a higher ranking than me! Oh well. At least he's having fun.

In an attempt to keep Jacob from jumping on (and destroying) my furniture, I have purchased him his own little trampoline. (Thanks, Marsha for the suggestion!) The idea is that by giving him something he is allowed to jump on, he can avoid the temptation to jump on the couches. He was amazingly timid with it, which surprised me. But I have made its purpose clear to him, so we'll see how it unfolds...

July 4th

We went to my in-laws house for a 4th of July celebration on Friday. They have the perfect spot to view the fireworks from Lakemont park. Jacob had a blast with the kids, and was a wild man with the sparklers (which made me very nervous!). He never made it past 5 minutes into the firework display. He fell asleep in Greg's arms, and Greg actually had to hold Jake's head in his hand. He was so tired, when we got home and were putting him to bed, he stumbled several times before crashing. Then he actually slept until 9 this morning, which is a rarity for him.

More Thoughts from Jacob

Today while waiting for a friend to visit, Jake got a pack of fruit snacks and said, "I'm just going to have this little appetizer before Katie gets here."

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I've mentioned before that Jake has trouble with 'th' sounds. We've been working here and there on saying 'th' instead of 'f,d or s.' Yesterday, Jake surrounded himself with pillows and said, "Mom I made myself a fort....um, I mean thort. Th, th, th thort."

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"You're nothing but a mediocre clarinet player." I think he got that from a spongebob episode.

School Lunch

Today we walked down to C.W. Longer's playground with my sister in-law and two nieces. The kids played for a while and then we went to Longer's free lunch. Jake was very, very impressed with the school and the cafeteria! He asked Brooke if they ate hot dogs everyday! The girls came back to our house to play for a while and when they left, Jake asked me to find out when they were serving chicken nuggets so that we could go back! If only it were so easy to please him all the time!