What's That Smell?

Did I ever tell you about the time I caught my cat on fire?  If you've been my friend for more than ten years, I'm sure you know the story.  I bet some of you can even remember when it happened!  My boss at the time asked me how "Old Fire Butt" was doing for years after the incident.  If you haven't known me that long, or haven't heard the story, well then, let me enlighten you.

The story actually starts well before the cat comes into the picture.  It all began one afternoon when I was working at the day program for adults with special needs.  It was the end of the day and all of our guys had gone home.  I went to my purse and opened my wallet with the intention of grabbing a soda from the machine (yes, this was back when I drank soda!).  When I looked into my wallet, it was empty.  Completely empty.  No credit cards, no cash, Nada.  My first thought was that one of my guys unknowingly took my stuff.  No big deal.  I would call their house staff and get it  back.  I called several of my client's residential staff and none of them found any of my belongings.  That's when I started to worry.

It's also when I recalled the last place I had seen my wallet...on the front seat of my car, where it had been all night long, with the car doors unlocked.  Um...oops!

I hurried home and called the police to file a police report.  While I was waiting for the police to arrive, I decided to call and cancel my credit cards.  At the time, my (now ex) husband and I had two cats - Ziel, who I make reference quite a bit, and Frey, who we endearingly called "Little Shit."  Little Shit was actually my (ex) mother-in-law's cat that we took in when she was unable to care for it.  It was a gray long haired cat.  Well, while I was on the phone with Visa, I heard this unusual "shrshshhhh" sound beside me.  I looked over and there beside me, with her tail over a jar candle, was Little Shit, tail ablaze like a giant torch reaching out of her rear end!

Oh my GOD!  The cat was on FIRE! And she didn't even know it!  Without thinking, I took two deep and fast breaths and literally blew out my cat.  Luckily, the fire was extinguished before her skin was burned.  When I tell the story, it seems like a longer amount of time than it really was.  The whole thing went down in a fraction of a second, I'm sure.

Just after I blew out the cat, my door bell rang.  It was the police officer.  I invited him in, apologizing that my house smelled like burned cat.  He excused the scent, but after a few moments asked if we could go outside and complete the report, so he could see better.  Yeah, see better, that's why.  Sure it was.

All things considered, the day ended pretty well.  I was able to cancel my cards and wasn't held accountable for any of the charges, and the cat was saved from what could have been a very painful experience.  It could have been a lot worse for both of us.

What's the lesson to be learned here, my friends?  Well, it's twofold.  Keep a good eye on your wallet.  And don't burn candles in a place that is typically trafficked by long haired pets!

Oh, and the smell of burned pet hair cannot be masked with fragrances, and it takes about a week to dissipate.  You know, just an FYI.

Greased Lightning

During a routine trip to Target two nights ago, Andrew decided that he simply, absolutely, without a doubt, must have a pop-up Lightning McQueen tent.  It wasn't just a matter of who was going to win the race, it was indeed a matter of life or death.  Of course, not wanting to cause my own child's demise, I forked over the $30 for the toy.  I left Target with none of the items I intended to buy and a $65 transaction on my debit card.  How does that happen?  Kids, my dear friends.  That's how. 

Now, let's back track just a bit.

I played Spent the other night online.  You can play it here: http://playspent.org/ 

It's a game that simulates real life scenarios to see if you could make it through the month facing conditions which are too much of a reality to people living in poverty.  I made it through the game with a few bucks in my pocket, but I had to make some tough decisions.  I sent my kid to school in generic sneakers, hoping he didn't get beaten up because of them.  I gave my pet away to the shelter.  I chose not to pay for my child's field trip, so he had to sit in the school office for the day while the rest of his class played.  There were more hard choices too.  I left Target two nights ago thinking that if I were truly living in poverty, I wouldn't have bought that tent.  The money would have gone to gas or groceries or some other necessity.  It left me feeling both grateful and a little unappreciative at the same time.  

I'm so glad that my children are not faced with the consequences of living in poverty.  I see kids every day who live in situations that are heartbreaking.  Sometimes, though, if the kids I work with have good parents, they can actually turn disadvantage to their advantage.  They are appreciative and grateful, unassuming and thoughtful.  Can I say the same about my own kids?  I'm not so sure.  My kids have so much stuff that they really don't appreciate half of it.  They assume that they will leave the store with at least a pack of gum, maybe more, each time we head out.  The question in their minds isn't if they can buy a book at the book fair, but which book should they choose.  

I try to use teaching opportunities to help my kids realize their blessings.  I hope and I pray that my example will lead them to a life of gratitude and generosity, not entitlement and selfishness, but I guess that only time will tell.  In the meantime, I am trying to focus my own energies on enjoying and appreciating what we have...and among our blessings is now is a giant Lightning McQueen tent in our living room! 

 Andrew isn't the only one who love the tent.  Sam has been using it as his hideout too.  It makes a great place for stalking unsuspecting legs to bite. 

Look out.  Those baby teeth are sharp!

What Was I Thinking?

Well, it is official.  I have signed up for the May 6^th Pittsburgh Marathon.  

Yep, the full 26.2 miler.  

Whew! 

26.2 miles.  

Twenty six point two miles! 

That’s a long way to run!  

I’m super excited…and maybe also a little terrified.  I’m worried about my hip and knees, and I’m worried about my stomach too.  I am currently only running 2 miles at a time, which isn’t far enough to cause stomach irritation. I hope that the benefits from chia seeds and other dietary changes I have made are apparent when I get into the longer runs so that I can avoid, well, the runs! (I know, nice huh?) 

Equally as disconcerting (or maybe even more so) is my hip.  At this point, after I run those two short miles I need chiropractic care as well as ice, ice, ice!  That worries me a little, but I talked to my chiropractor before I registered and he is optimistic about my body’s response to manipulations, and confident that I can run the race, if I am sensible in my training.  

Sensible.  What a word.  It sounds so easy, but sometimes sense slips just outside of my grasp.  If I am truly going to run a marathon, I need to prevent sense from eluding me, so I have come up with a plan.  Here’s what I have so far:

1.  Eat right.  I think this will only be a moderate struggle for me.  I eat pretty well most of the time.  Now, I do have a tendency to get off track from time to time.  That’s OK.  An occasional slip up here and there isn’t going to cause any major set backs, but if I habitually lapse, there could be serious repercussions. I’m confident that if I have a concrete goal in mind, I will be better able to retain control.  The words “control freak” have been used to describe me on more than one occasion.   The chance to be controlling in a constructive manner is oh –so-enticing! 

Part of the concern with eating right stems less from lack of common sense, and more from an anticipation of a voraciously increased and insatiable appetite.  If my appetite grew while training for the half marathon, it only goes to say that I will also experience an upsurge when training for a whole marathon.  The trick will be to fuel and refuel with healthy choices, not junk. I’m OK with putting on a few pounds of muscle (hey, my ass never looked better than it did last May!), but I also know that it is extremely easy to gain fat while training for a marathon.  

Sounds crazy, doesn’t it?  How could anyone possibly get fat while logging 10, 15, 20 miles a day?  Well, they can, because they think that running those distances is a free pass for eating whatever they want.  Not so.  If anything, it’s more important than ever to make sure that you are nourishing your body with appropriate foods rather than convenient junky foods during intense training.  This will mean having lots of healthy snacks on hand, in addition to making healthy meals.  I have confidence that I can tailor my eating accordingly.  It will just take planning, and hey, if nothing else, I am a planner at heart!  A planner and a control freak…makes you wonder how someone could stand being married to me, doesn’t it! (Don't answer that!)

2.  Train well, but don’t over train.  It’s easy to let nerves get the best of you and to over-prepare as compensation for that anxiety.  It is 100% in my personality to over-train for something as big as my first marathon, but I am actually not terribly concerned with this part of my plan.  You see, I have a job, small children and a husband who is very supportive, but works like a maniac.  I actually think that my life will simply get in the way of my training and prevent me from over-doing it.  One of the few times I can be grateful for the chaos!

3.  Don’t let my desk job destroy my joints.  “Huh?” you say.  “Isn’t the running what’s destroying your joints?”  Well, yes and no.  The running is hard on your body, but so is sitting all day.  It shortens your leg muscles and makes them tight.  Then they pull you out of alignment when you are running.  I pulled a page out of my latest issue of Runner’s World that has some easy exercises specifically designed to counter act the impact a desk job on a runner’s body!  Talk about perfect timing!  Now I just need to bring a resistance band and a ball to work.  If anyone asks, I’ll say they’re for the kids!  

4.  Read, research and implement good training strategies.  Reading and researching is not a problem.  I’m an avid reader and I’m constantly looking things up and reading what I can.  As for implementing, that’s another story.  I’m chock full of good intentions. Like this morning, for example.  It was the 5^th time in a row that I reset my alarm clock, choosing to snooze rather than get up and do some strength training.  Strength training which I SWORE I was going to do when I went to bed last night.  Which, brings me to the next step in my plan:

5.  Find a cross training/ strength training routine and stick with it.  I know that my lack of strength training is at least somewhat to blame for my hip and knee issues.  I know this, yet somehow, I still manage to find reasons not to strength train.  I’m an idiot.  I need to quit the belly-aching and get moving.  I love running.  I love it so much that I don’t want to do any other kinds of workouts.  Well, if I want to be able to continue running for years to come, then I need to do the other workouts too.  Enough said. 

6.  Be realistic.  No problem here.  I don’t have any grand ideas of speed.  I rarely do.  Once in a while I’ll get notion to pump up my speed, but it often quickly fizzles out. I’m not a fast runner. I never really was.  My fastest time is about 7:50 a mile and I can only keep that up for 2 miles.  That pace is reserved for my speed work days.  On long distances, I have historically averaged out at about 10 minutes per mile, sometimes slower.  That’s certainly no record breaking pace, and I am totally OK with that.  Just like my first half marathon, I am going into my first whole marathon with my only expectation being to finish it.  If it takes me 5 hours or even 6, I’m OK with it.  I just want to cross that finish line.  

Along those lines, I need to be realistic with my mileage too.  A 10% increase per week is all that is recommended.  That’s OK, because I have 7 months to train.  I might not get caught up in speed, but it’s totally foreseeable for me to decide to run extreme miles.  Starting low is hard.  Even when I wasn’t training for races, I ran around 5 miles a day.  Starting at 2 and keeping the mileage low in the beginning is going to be a struggle for me.  I know I will want to go longer too soon.  Again, I need to keep my eye on the prize and be reasonable.  Over doing it now could risk an injury that would set me months behind, and that is not where I want to end up.  So when I’m considering doing another lap, or running just a little farther, I’ll just make myself reconsider.  

7.  Last, but certainly not least - relax and enjoy the ride.  I can do this.  I totally can!  I took nearly two years off from running in the midst of my battle with headaches and headache related complications, and I came back stronger than ever.  I worked up to it, and I breezed through my first half marathon.  Most importantly, I loved nearly every minute of my training as well as the race itself.  I felt more confident and mentally clear during those months than I had in a long time prior.  Since the half marathon, aside from the July 4^th 15K, I have been steadily decreasing my running.  With that decrease in mileage I have seen a notable increase in tension.  Running is my release.  It’s my time alone.  It’s my time to resolve the problems that keep me up at night.  It’s my planning time, my connection with the outside, my self-esteem booster.  I am so ready to get back on the road and get some serious miles under my feet.  I said it before and I’ll say it again – I really think that anyone can finish a marathon if they train properly.  I’m not special because I run long distances.  I’m special because I am dedicated.  And I am pumped about being dedicated to the Pittsburgh Marathon!  City of Bridges, here I come!

This Is The Life

What a wonderful day I had yesterday!  In the morning, Andrew and I made a road trip for an impromptu meeting with some old friends.  He was amazingly good and played on the playground for several hours while we caught up with one another.  There's something to be said for long time female friends.  It is such a blessing to be able to vent and not be judged or misunderstood, to be comfortable in who we are together and to know what we have seen each other through.  We all agreed that an afternoon together was just what we needed to recharge our weary batteries.  I send out my love to you beautiful women, and I am also sending out my love to my other group of cherished friends.  Some of us were able to get together in August, but not everyone.  I know we have been struggling to find time in our busy schedules to gather once again.  Let's keep trying.  You all dwell in the parts of my soul that would benefit from constant refreshing! 

After the visit with friends, Andrew went to my mom's to spend the night and Jacob and I were able to have our own little date night.  For me to have time alone with Jake, the world has to practically stop, so I think we were both happy about our evening of bonding.  We played LIFE.  We played by Jake's rules, which are slightly twisted, but hey, it wasn't about rules last night, it was about time.  And I actually won the game with $1,328,000 in the bank.  I can live with that...unless I end up living a freakishly long life and outspending myself!  

 Sammy joined us for the game, with Jacob's blessing. 

"Hey, what are you guys doing over there?"

"Life is boring.  I'm going to take a nap!"

Jacob also enjoyed his snack, sent home by one of my friends. 

This day was given a "Two Thumbs Up" rating by Williams and Orr.  

This morning we put up all of our inside and outside Halloween decorations.  It's simply a beautiful fall day where I am, and I just can't spend one more minute inside.  I'm taking the baby monitor out to the porch, and I'm going to read a book in the fresh air while Andrew finishes his nap.  I can't think of a better way to end a wonderful weekend.

Summer 2011

Click here to view this photo book larger

The Untidy Toddler

Last night, I asked Andrew to pick up his toys so that I could vacuum.  This was the result: 

 It looks like a toddler version of "Hoarders: Buried Alive."

Now, the living room floor was completely clear, so the mission was accomplished. With that in mind, I chose not to comment on his tidying skills.  I'm just not quite sure where he's pulling his technique from.  I can assure you that the "shove and dump" method is not one that I employ!  If you hear him saying, "damn it to hell," well, I have to take the blame. But this type of cleaning, if you can call it that, could only have been learned from Greg!

Good Eats

It's been a while since I've posted a good recipe.  That's because in the crazy haze of daily life, I have really gotten away from trying anything new.  We've been eating well, but I've been sticking to good old stand by's, just because I haven't had the time or energy to spend looking up or cooking new stuff.  It just happens that Runner's World sent out this yummy recipe in a recent newsletter.  It was very easy to make and will now be added to our list of go-to recipes.  I used jalapeno peppers from my dad's garden, and they are the hottest damn jalapenos ever!  This dish had a little kick to it, with just one small jalapeno, but I imagine it would be a lot milder with a store bought pepper. The last time I cooked with my dad's peppers, I somehow got the pepper juices around my lips and in my nose while I was preparing the dish.  I could hardly breathe!  I had to actually stop cooking and run my entire face under water!  It was awful.  Don't worry, I recovered, and I still ate dinner, which was very good - tuna burgers...have I posted that recipe?  It's super easy and very good too, although we don't often eat it.  It calls for canned tuna which is (just) OK for you, but still has the processing, and then there's the whole ethics issue with dolphins and tuna, yadda, yadda, yadda...

Anyway, this is a recipe using my all time favorite heart healthy and protein packed quinoa, as well as sweet potatoes, another one of my favs.  Here's what it looks like:

And here's the recipe:

• Chicken Sweet Potato Stir Fry
• 
  
• 1 C WATER
• 1/2 C QUINOA, RINSED AND DRAINED
• 1 MED SWEET POTATO (ABOUT 8 OZ), PEELED AND CUT INTO 1/2" CUBES
• 4 TSP CANOLA OIL
• 12 OZ BONELESS, SKINLESS CHICKEN BREAST, CUT INTO 1/2" PIECES
• 1 MED ONION, CHOPPED
• 1 JALAPENO CHILE PEPPER, FINELY CHOPPED
• 1 MED RED BELL PEPPER, CHOPPED
• 1 CLOVE GARLIC, MINCED
• 1 TSP GROUND CUMIN
• 1 C FROZEN PEAS
• 3 TBSP CHOPPED FRESH CILANTRO
• 1/4 TSP SALT
• 1/8 TSP BLACK PEPPER

Directions

1.

Combine water and quinoa in small saucepan over medium-high heat. Bring to a boil, reduce heat to medium, and simmer until liquid has been absorbed, 12 to 15 minutes.

2.

Put sweet potato in small saucepan with enough cold water to cover by 2" while quinoa is cooking. Bring to a boil over medium-high heat and cook until just tender, 3 to 4 minutes. Drain.

3.

Heat 2 teaspoons of the oil in large nonstick frying pan or cast-iron skillet over medium-high heat. Add chicken and cook, stirring occasionally, until starting to brown, about 4 minutes. Transfer to bowl.

4.

Return pan to heat and add remaining 2 teaspoons oil. Stir in onion and jalapeno pepper. Cook, stirring occasionally, 1 minute. Add bell pepper, garlic, and cumin. Cook until vegetables start to soften, 2 to 3 minutes. Stir in peas and reserved chicken and cook 2 minutes. Add quinoa and sweet potato. Cook, stirring frequently, until heated through, 1 to 2 minutes. Remove from heat and stir in cilantro, salt, and black pepper.  (Thank you, Runner's World)

To balance our super healthy dinner, Andrew and I made Halloween cup cakes for dessert...this recipe comes straight from Betty Crocker!  I can cook, but I'm no baker.  And when it comes to sweets, well, I'm just not that picky -  I love it all! The mix was an impulse buy at Giant Eagle this afternoon.  It was actually less the cup cakes themselves that enticed me, and more the Halloween fun-fetti icing! 

I love fall.  It's my favorite time of year.  I love the cooler (but not cold) weather, the beautiful leaves which are especially spectacular in the rolling hills of central Pennsylvania.  I love fall clothing, fall foods, fall holidays, you name it!  So do my boys, and I have found that every time of year is better with little kids than it ever was before they were born.  It's exciting seeing them be excited about things that I may have noticed, but never fully appreciated until I became a mother.  Andrew was ecstatic about 4 little gourds he got with my father in law this afternoon, and Jacob is absolutely thrilled about Halloween, as he is every year.  We plan to spend this weekend digging out our decorations and making our house as spooky as I can stand it!  Soon we'll get our pumpkins, carve Jack-O-Lanterns and roast the seeds with my sister in law, Dalann's all time best seed roasting recipe! (If she gives the OK, I'll post it for you all) I can't wait!  

What's your favorite season?  What do you like best about the fall?  Don't email me - post a comment!  

More Cow Bell!

Last night I installed the latest in high-tech preschooler alarm devises - the cow bell.

There wasn't a person in the house who didn't know when this little guy escaped!  After a few early evening re-directions, we all slept soundly.  Can you say, "more cow bell?" 

Sleep Tight

After much delay, for various reasons, Andrew has finally made the transition to a big boy bed.  He spent the last two nights in the bed and, all in all, has done pretty well so far.  The first night he only got out of bed once.  Last night it was 3 times.  It could definitely be a lot worse.

Checking out his new pad.

"I think I'm gonna like it here."

"No, scratch that.  I'm gonna LOVE it here!"

While he has made the adjustment relatively quickly, I have not.  I spent last night in a state of half sleep, either worrying that he was going to get out of bed and wander away, thinking I heard him getting out of bed only to check and find him sleeping soundly, or dreaming that he was out of his bed behaving recklessly and endangering himself as well as the whole family.  Today I am going to Michael's to get some sleigh bells to hang on his door.  I hope I will sleep more soundly if I know there is an "alarm" to wake me when he has escaped.  I won't feel like I have to keep one ear open at all times.  

I have to admit that it feels a bit strange to go into his room now.  It feels so open and mature.  Without the crib, all indications that this was once a baby's room are gone.  He is growing, and with each evolution he takes, we as a family are one step further away from the days of raising little kids.  In some respects, it's freeing.  With his maturity, we have gained flexibility that we previously didn't have.  We can go more, see more, do more.  But I know that the times of snuggling on the couch and spontaneous kisses and hugs are limited.  This transition is yet another reminder to cherish the moment for the moment, to sneak in as many extra squeezes as I can, and to be grateful for the blessings that come with each rising sun.  

Well, nearly two months into working full time and I finally feel as if I am somewhat adjusted.  I started noticing in the last week or so that I am no longer feeling like I could collapse into an irreversible coma at any given moment between the hours of 3 pm and 7 pm.  I'm (sort of) getting the hang of what I am doing at work, and I have begun a routine at home that allows me to feel productive without spending the entire weekend cooking and cleaning.  There's a lot of fine tuning to do, and I am sure that over the next few months as we add in the extra curricular activities for Jacob and then the holiday hoopla, I will still feel overrun, but at least I'm on the right track.

I never realized just how much I actually did during those 10 hours each week until I lost that time!  Isn't that always the case?  You don't know what you have until it's gone.  For me, that's not entirely true.  I always appreciated the opportunity to work only part time.  I knew that we were lucky to be financially secure enough for me to be part time, and that I was even luckier to have a husband who was able and willing to work extra if we needed the cash.  I'm still lucky enough to have that wonderful man by my side.  Now, I need to look at my new situation as a blessing too.  I am blessed to have been asked to take this new position at work.  It is a great opportunity for my professional growth, and also for me personally.  I like routine and if I don't have a reason to exit my comfort zone, I will stay in one place forever.  This is a wonderfully positive  motivator to learn new things, gain new skills and branch out.  After 4 years of stillness, this is a welcome change.

There are a lot of extrinsic stresses that come with this new job that I think are just part of the territory.  I am constantly questioning my own leadership style, testing the depth of my responsibilities, examining the strength of my own integrity and being mindful of the importance of extending patience.  I'm also gaining new perspectives.  It's much different to see my job from both the management and direct service points of view.  I have a greater appreciation of both sides, and I am especially grateful for the guidance I have received from my direct supervisor recently.  She has helped me come to terms with some heavy burdens and has given me directives that I think will be very useful in the future.  Amen, for having someone decent to talk to!

Aside from all of the psycho-babble mumbo jumbo about how I am dealing with my stresses at work and in life in general, I also wanted to talk about...you guessed it...eating.  You all know that I did the purification program in July/August, at the same time I started my new position at work.  I was shocked to find that I didn't feel good at all.  In retrospect, I don't think that it was the purification program that made me feel so run down.  In fact, the purification probably kept me from complete collapse!  I know that the exhaustion was due to all the stress and adjustment I was under.  I talked to my chiropractor and he gave me a supplement to help my body handle stress better.  I took it for a little while, continued to be very careful about what I was eating, and I have over the last 3 weeks noticed a huge improvement.

Over the last month or so, I have had very little refined carbohydrates.  I have bulked up on fresh fruit and vegetables.  I have had one or two alcoholic drinks, but mostly I drink only water (OK, and coffee.  I will always drink lots of coffee!)  I'm eating small, nutritionally dense meals, maintaining a stable blood sugar and I feel good!  I even lost 4 pounds without even trying!  I'm not going to kid you, I'm tired.  I'll always be tired, but I am not exhausted.  Greg and I, for some unknown reason, have gotten into a habit of going to bed much later than we used to (I'm talking 10-1030 routinely now instead of 9-930).  I know that's hardly late, but when he gets up at 430 to go to work, it's really not a lot of sleep.  Even though we are spending less time in bed, the quality of my sleep has improved somewhat.  I will never be someone who says, "I slept all night and didn't move a muscle until the sun came out!"  It just won't happen, but I am getting between 4-6 hours of decent enough sleep.  I'm tired in the morning, but I am now able to shake the sleep from my head within 10 minutes of waking.  And most noticeable is what I said before - that I do not hit that insurmountable wall in the late afternoon/early evening anymore.  What a blessing!

I also think that I am handling stress much better.  Yes, some of that can be attributed to simple acclimation, but I also give credit to healthy eating.  Having a body that is hyped up on sugar or tricked out on impure substances does not make for ideal physiology.  Feeling already off your game going into stress makes it worse.  Being in optimal physical health means that you can focus your mental energy where it needs to be.

Likewise, eating healthfully has always improved my headaches.  Dealing with life's adjustments with headaches feels practically impossible at times.  Having struggled with headaches for so long, I am always appreciative of a clear head.

As if those reasons weren't compelling enough to make you want to tweak your diet for the better, let me add another bonus - increased libido.  Don't worry, I'm not going into any extreme details on this topic, but I do want to put this out there, because I think a lot of women struggle with a waxing and waning sex drive in addition to coping with gobs of every day life stress.  Over the last few years I have read some articles, and done some "experiments" of my own.  While everyone is different, I think that two basic physical principles apply to most of us.  One -  the more you have sex, the more you will want it.  It's the elementary "use it or lose it" concept.  Enough said.

The second principle is that eating right can increase your desire, and I think that it has multiple components.  The most logical is the same concept that applies to handling stress.  When you are healthy, your body is working at its optimal levels and normal, healthy people want to have sex. That one is pretty simple.

The second component to principle two comes from an article I once read that outlined centers for satiety in the human brain.  It said that we have four basic centers: hunger, thirst, sleep and sex. When one center is not satisfied, the other centers will increase cravings as well.  That is why people often mistake thirst for hunger, and why we have increased appetites when we haven't slept well.  The article suggested that people who were dieting have sex instead of having a snack.  Well, of course if you have sex instead of eating, you will lose weight. You're consuming less and burning calories too!  However, it also said that people who have sex on an empty stomach reported higher levels of satisfaction, an even better reason to forgo the chips!  We have put this concept to the test.  Now, if I haven't eaten all day, I need a meal, not nookie, but if it's 930 and I'm feeling snacky...well, let's just say that getting my snack in another form has proven to be beneficial in more ways than one.

I also think that when you are eating healthfully, you feel better about your  body.  Isn't body image a huge factor for women?  If I just ate half a pan of brownies (now you all know where Andrew gets his sweet tooth!), the last thing I want to do is lay naked with my big old brownie belly flopping all over the place.  Gross!  But if I have been eating well, I feel better about myself.   I may not look like I did when I was 19, and yes, healthy eating or not, that still bothers me.  But at least I feel well over all, and feeling well is truly the biggest factor for me.  Having the energy to stay up a little later at night, having the ability to put life's stress in the back of my mind instead of the foreground for a while, and feeling attractive add up to the perfect conditions for love....those things and the fact that I have an incredibly sexy and attentive husband!  I can't take all the credit!

And then there's what I call the cycle of sex, which doesn't necessarily have anything to do with food, but since I'm on the topic of sex, I may as well continue, right?!  It does connect back to the beginning of this entry when I am talking about feeling better all around.  While it isn't the most important part of a marriage, sex is a wonderful way to stay connected with your spouse.  When we aren't having regular sex, I feel disconnected.  When we go through a slump, I feel guilty and Greg gets irritable.  The longer the slump, the worse it gets.  A few nights of catching up and it's all erased. (Honestly, it's this easy for us because we have a very strong connection outside of the bedroom too.  That's the most important thing).  Regular sex reinforces our relationship.  We sleep better and feel more affectionate towards one another throughout the day.  These are emotional responses, but they are physically based.  When you have an orgasm, your brain releases oxytocin. This hormone increases the positive emotions associated with your partner, increases feelings of trust and generosity and also acts as a natural pain reliever.   Why wouldn't you want to bathe you brain in this wonderful natural drug as often as possible?!

So there you have it - an update on life and some tips to a better sex life!  Now go de-stress yourselves and find the ones you love!  Most importantly, eat well and enjoy this beautiful fall day!

Who Needs A Little Girl...

When I have a perfectly girly little boy! 

Brownie Thief

Last night I made a batch of brownies for Andrew to share with the sitter while Greg and I went out with friends. While I was in the bathroom getting ready to go out, Andrew used a kitchen chair to climb onto the counter and help himself to the brownies. Needless to say, the sitter didn't get any!

Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible. 

                                ~ Dalai Lama


Oh, I have felt conflict as of late!  It seems like I am face to face with malice on a daily basis. I am trying hard to understand the motivations of others.  Is it jealousy?  A need to belong, a commaraderie found in uniting against others?  Is it stress or laziness or societal pressures?  Why exactly are people so mean to one another?


One of my favorite sayings is: "It is what it is."  I am not a person who spends large amounts of time trying to figure out motivations behind other people's actions.  That's not to say that I don't wonder why, just that I think it is useless to waste a lot of energy trying to guess and figure out what someone else is thinking.  Someone once told me that I needed to eliminate three word combinations from my vocabulary "would have, should have and could have."  It doesn't matter what could have been.  It is what it is, and that isn't going to change by thinking about the past.  Deal with the present to the best of your capacity.  Change what you can in the future.  Learn from your mistakes, and learn from the mistakes of others.  Forgive yourself and forgive others. That's all you can do.  Anything else is just a waste of energy. 


I guess the logic in my attempts to desipher other people's motivations right now is simply to gain perspective.  Maybe if I knew what was going on in their minds, I would better understand their behavior.  It's not that I think outside stressors excuse poor behavior, but they certainly make it more understandable.  


Moreover, I am trying to figure out my own role.  Do I speak up?  How much to I excuse?  How much do I allow?  Where is my comfort level?  At what point do I feel that my own integrity is being compromised? Where are my boundaries?  Is it even my place to take action or am I out of line?  


This blog entry is so vague, and I apologize.  I cannot say more, because these battles are simply not mine to voice.  Nonetheless I am feeling very personally conflicted. So conflicted that it is keeping me up at night and is on my mind during any free moments during the day.   I realized last night that my sole actions right now should be focused in channeling my own kindness.  Perhaps kindness will prove to be just as contagious as its negative counterpart.  Even if it isn't, at least I will know that I have acted with compassion myself.  I will not support the crowd simply to belong, or to avoid making waves.  Maybe I can even shed a benevolent perspective on the situation at hand. And if none of that comes true, at least I will find comfort in knowing that I personally acted with sincerity.    

Prayer of Saint Francis

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace.

Where there is hatred, let me sow love.

Where there is injury, pardon.

Where there is doubt, faith.

Where there is despair, hope.

Where there is darkness, light.

Where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive.

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

Sneaky Snacker

Yesterday I made a mini trip to the grocery store to pick up a few items to tide us over until I can do the big shopping trip.  Among the items purchase was a pint of strawberries.  I rinsed them, but in the chaos of last night, didn't get around to cutting them up for our lunches today.  This morning, I opened the pint and began cutting.  About 2/3 of the way through the container, I came across this:

I think there's a sneaky snacker in the Williams household.  I think his name starts and ends with ANDREW!

Prayer of St. Francis by Sarah MacLachlan

Hop, Skip and Jump

On Sunday, Greg and I took the boys to Canoe Creek for a little nature walk.  While we were there, Greg gave the boys a little rock skipping lesson.  Jacob was a fast learner, skipping rocks all over the water.  We are still waiting for Andrew's skills of finesse to come through...perhaps with maturity.  Actually, we hope a lot of things come through for Andrew with a little maturity!  Either way, skipping rocks or sinking them, the boys had fun.  What kid doesn't love playing in the mud and water and being given permission to throw rocks?!  

"Let me show you how it's done, Son."

A pro rock skipper in the making!

Excellent follow-through.

Andrew's technique, on the other hand, needs a little refining.  He approaches rock skipping with the same vigor that he uses to approach all aspects of his life - full force, head-on!

Andrew never wastes an opportunity to perform!

I believe he was both singing and conducting The Star Spangled Banner.

Making mud circles.