Andrew's Swing/Mother's Day/ Eye Drop Woes

Just a very short video of Andrew on his swing this weekend before we left for Pittsburgh. Usually he's more animated than this, but this what I happened to get.

We had a nice weekend. My niece's birthday party went well, as did our Mother's Day exchange. We only had one major issue, which I will explain in this blog, with a little background first:

A few years ago, Jacob went through a phase (which lasted about 18 months) during which he refused to take oral medication. Those of you who were around me during that time know that I am not exaggerating when I say I was at my wit's end with him. We tried everything and I mean EVERYTHING! We put meds in yogurt, applesauce, milkshakes, soda, juice - you name it. I even put it in an unfrozen Freeze Pop, shook it up, resealed it, froze it and gave it to him in Popsicle form. He took one lick and said, "This doesn't taste right." He was 2 at the time. His ability to detect medication in any medium was both highly frustrating and freaky. At times I thought that perhaps he had some psychic powers!

One time, after a particularly draining session of pleading and unsuccessful cajoling, I said to him, "Jacob, either you take this medicine nicely, or I will have to wrap you up in a towel and shove it down your throat." His response? A very calm, "Go get the towel." Then he stood there nicely while I wrapped him tightly in the towel and let me restrain him! When I tipped him backwards and forced the medicine into his mouth, he gargled it and spit it out all over me.

This all happened during a time which he was still getting very frequent ear infections, and needed to have antibiotics often. We ended up taking him to the doctor for injections, because of his refusal, several times. The last time I remember very clearly. It was a three shot series of antibiotic. Initially he cried and was afraid. At the second visit he barely whimpered. On the third visit he actually rolled up his shorts and patted his thigh for the nurse! It was a blatant act of defiance. He didn't care what it took, he was NOT putting medication into his mouth.

We tried role playing with him. My mother had a toy and said something like, "When I'm sick, I take medicine in my mouth so I feel better." Jake took his toy and very happily responded, "When I'm sick, I go to the doctor and get a shot!"

It was maddening. There was nothing we could do. It was a battle of wills, and I am ashamed to say, after all of my years as a Parent Educator, that I lost this battle miserably. I had to just wait until one day he decided that he would take meds orally. There was no, "because I'm the mom, that's why." He didn't care, and I held no clout.

The point of telling this story is because we are now at this point with yet another form of medication. On Thursday I got a call from school saying that Jacob was having an allergic reaction of some sort. They gave him benadryl on my order, and I rushed to get him. By the time I got there, the whites of his eyes were so swollen that the iris appeared to be recessed. It was the freakiest thing I have ever seen. He was also red, puffy, and swollen with hives on the rest of his face, but he was not having any difficulty breathing. Still, I was worried about his sight. I've seen someone with puffy skin around their eyes, but I've never actually seen a swollen eye ball. The ER doctor told me later that if the reaction is bad enough, it's not uncommon for the conjunctiva (whites) to swell as well as the surrounding skin.

I called the doctor and took him to the emergency room. By the time we were seen at the ER, the benadryl was working and the swelling had significantly decreased. Still, his eyes were terribly red. My dad gave us a new bottle of prescription allergy eye drops, and I think the world came to a screeching halt when we tried to administer them. The first night, it took Greg and I both, restraining him and prying his eyes open, lots of screaming (from all parties) just to get the damn drops in.

Last night, at my sister's we had the same battle. I couldn't get the drops into his eyes myself because he was thrashing and screaming as if I had branded him with a hot iron. I asked my poor, calm and soft spoken brother-in-law to help me restrain him, but when I looked at the pained expression on Dustin's face as he was holding Jacob's arms and legs, I knew I had to get someone else's help. My mom tried, two of my aunts, my sister and my dad. No luck. I told Jacob that he could not come back downstairs until he let me put the eye drops in. He chose to go to bed at 730 during a family party instead of using the drops. His eyes are puffy and red today, obviously.

I don't know what else to do. I feel that this is yet another battle that I just won't win, and frankly, I don't want to fight it at all. I actually don't feel comfortable prying his eyes open. I'm afraid I'm going to hurt him, and I also hate the fact that this whole ordeal leaves everyone involved highly agitated and screaming. Oral medications work somewhat, so at this point, I guess we will just have to make due with that. Any suggestions are highly appreciated. This kid is a handful, to say the least, and this is another notch he can carve into his belt, not mine.