A Big Change

I haven't really cut my hair since before I got pregnant with Jacob.   I've had trims once a year or so, and a random perm here and there, but for the most part, it's been the same style (or lack thereof) and color (or also lack thereof) for over a decade.  The main reason for my lack of style is just plain laziness.  I'll be honest.  I don't feel like wasting time fixing my hair.  When it's long,  I don't have to fix it.  I let it air dry and pull it up....nearly every day.  What's easier than that?  I also don't like to go anywhere nice for the same reason.  I don't want to put energy into my appearance.  I do not have an innate sense of style.  I never feel like I look good, even when I try, so why would I put myself such agony unless absolutely necessary?  My ideal daily attire consists of sneakers or flip flops, jeans or running shorts and a T-shirt.  I don't do fancy outfits or jewelry, and I wear a minimal amount of make up.  Really, the only reason people don't see me in sweatpants more often is because of the dress code at work!  I'm not allowed to wear jeans, so I have resigned myself to looking a more presentable, with a little bit of understated jewelry.  As soon as I come home, time permitting, I strip out of dress pants and into something with an elastic waist.  I can't help it.  It's just who I am.  

Most of the time, I am OK with who I am, my lack of style, my blah hair.  I don't give it a whole lot of thought.  It's really only when I have to go somewhere that requires looking nice that I start thinking about my appearance.  (OK, that's not entirely true.  I am compulsively obsessed with my weight, but that's a whole other bag of worms.)  Recently, I started wearing my glasses.  They're on for the long haul, because the fact of the matter is that I am now TOO OLD to compensate for my vision deficits.  I need them if I want to see.  Even though I've had a vision prescription since first grade, the fact that I have to wear glasses makes me feel old.  The glasses themselves make me feel old.  I feel like they accentuate the lines around my eyes.  Couple that with my latent insecurities and you get a very self conscious person.  It's not a great place to be.  I see myself in 25 years, fishing a pencil and maybe a few other office supplies out of a nest of thinning hair piled on the top of my head.  I just can't allow myself to become that woman.  

Sitting at work on Thursday, I became overwhelmed with the need to avoid my inevitable fate.  Hey, I have the power to change it, right?  So I sent a text message to my neighbor asking her to chop all of my hair off.  By the grace of God, she had an opening that evening!  I really think if I hadn't been able to go on Thursday, I would have lost my nerve.  I've been considering cutting my hair for over a year, but I always find a reason why I shouldn't do it...again namely, laziness.  

I'm so glad she was able to fit me in yesterday.  It was definitely the right decision.  It's WAY different than before, but not so different from a hairstyle I had in my early twenties.  It's so easy, that I can keep that self-grooming laziness.  Today I dried it in less than 5 minutes.  Perfect!  And Greg will be happy that I won't clog the drain anymore with my long strands of hair!  I have gotten nothing but compliments on my hair, which is great.  (Of course, the only person I think would have balls to say he didn't like it would be my dad.  But he said he liked it too!)  I'll admit, seeing people for the first time is making me feel a little self-conscious, just because it's a lot of attention.  But once the newness of it wears off, it'll all be good.  I'm happy with my hair, and I feel a little better about myself.  I can't get rid of the glasses, the laugh lines or the spare tire around my middle, but I can certainly get rid of that ratty hair!  

What do you think?  What's the most drastic change you have made to you appearance?  Some people make big changes all the time without a second thought.  Are you one of those people, or a creature of habit like me?